The Gauntlet: The new album is out Sept 9?

Brian Welch: Yeah, September 9th; three years in the making.

The Gauntlet: What took so long. Most people leave a largely successful band and already have that backup plan in motion.

Brian: I wrote my book, “Save Me From Myself.” I took some time off, did some work. I went in to record an album and then I didn’t feel like making music, then I did, then I didn’t. It was pretty much that type of deal. I go with the flow and whatever works out works out. I believe things are meant to be and just happen.

The Gauntlet: Where any of the songs written while with Korn?

Brian: No, I wrote all the songs for the album about 6 months after I left the band.

The Gauntlet: Is the music a soundtrack for the book?

Brian: There is some stuff that goes with it; some of the songs are from the book. I wrote about some of the things I went through in the book, and they do have the same title.

The Gauntlet: The book was a bit on the darkside.

Brian: I let it all out and put out everything I went through personally. I told the stories how they happened. I wrote about the good and bad times about Korn and my relationship with my wife. Some of it is pretty dark but it got light at the end.

The Gauntlet: Were you a little surprised when you announced you were leaving Korn to save your life basically and you were met by a huge backlash?

Brian: No, I knew that me announcing Christ, people would be making fun of me. I had read about others who had come out so I was ready for it. I did Crystal Meth for 2 years and then quit the band. I was stupid when I quit and still a little high as it took time for the drug to wear off. I said a lot of stupid things though. I freaked people out. I read about getting persecuted for my faith, then I said all these stupid things that got me persecuted. It was nuts. But that all faded away once I got healed a little bit. I just needed some time to pass. I grew, it is all good now.

The Gauntlet: So you understand the criticism?

Brian: Yeah, later down the line you think back and wonder why I did that. Everything works out, it all turns around. I have found that people are forgiving.

The Gauntlet: You haven’t had any relapses?

Brian: With drugs, no. With stupidness, sometimes [laughs] I think we are all a little nuts sometimes. Nothing like before though.

The Gauntlet: Is there a band, or is it just studio musicians?

Brian: I don’t have the live band set up, but I will. In the studio, it was just studio musicians. Josh Freese played with A Perfect Circle and Nine Inch Nails. Tony is just a legendary bass player. Trevor Dunn played in Mr. Bungle, he played bass too. A guy named Archie Muse played some bass too. It was cool because these guys were top of the line players. They came in and they had their expertise there.

The Gauntlet: Did you write all the parts?

Brian: Yeah, exactly. I wrote all the parts I was hearing in my head and got the basic idea down on tape and digital computer. They would come in. Josh would listen to my beat and say I am hearing this, and play it. He would basically play what I wrote but put his feel and talent on it.

The Gauntlet: Was it a daunting task to have so much freedom?

Brian: yeah, there were no time restraints. I had this solo album and no idea when it would be done. I went away and didn’t do much. I didn’t go on the internet or anything. I didn’t want to hear the comments like ‘where is the album.’ I wanted it out, but it just wasn’t out. It was difficult.

The Gauntlet: Is it hard to open up and put your soul into the album?

Brian: Yeah, in some parts. It was more difficult with the book though as I got into some really crazy stuff. There was some stuff I did that I really felt bad about. I had to write about it and it was hard to get it out. It’s hard to write about addiction and what your mind was like during that addiction. It was also cleansing and healing to get it out there. Especially knowing that it would help others down the line.

The Gauntlet: With the events being so recent, do you have to hold back a bit so friends and family aren’t hurt?

Brian: My parents were a little hurt. My mom was up for two days after reading the book. She was very upset. There have been a bunch of misunderstandings though. We are all good now. We have talked about it. So she is cool with it now. After the two days, she was fine about it and was glad I wrote about it to help other people. It is just life, that’s what I was talking about. People get over it.

The Gauntlet: What was the most difficult part in making the album?

Brian: Just fighting the old me and getting past my emotional instability. I was a mess. If things wouldn’t go my way or someone wasn’t doing their job they way I thought they should I’d break stuff in the studio. That happened a couple times and I’d bail out, no one would hear from me for weeks. Little baby stuff like that. I was my own worst enemy. Over time that faded away. I am a different man now, more laid back . I can get through the days without a problem now. I just draw my strength from Christ. To want to wake up, I get happy to wake up now. Except today, I had to do all this press [laughs].

The Gauntlet: The video for “Flush” is coming out shortly.

Brian: That will be coming out in um…it was completed yesterday, it has been shot, edited and color corrected. We will premiere it hopefully on Headbanger’s Ball. It is sort of a public service announcement mixed with a video; sex drugs, rock & roll, death, and then life again. There is a lot of craziness in the video. At the front and end of the video, I have some testimony from real kids talking about their addictions and freedoms from drugs. It is just like my story. It is just like the album, the video gives you hope.

The Gauntlet: “Flush” is a dark song. Is the video just as dark?

Brian: Yeah, it is pretty dark. But at the end of the video and the songs on the album, there is a euphoric lifting that ends with something positive. My video is very dark, but it ends with a positive message. If you read the bible, it is dark throughout with killings and stuff and then it ends with hope.

The Gauntlet: I thought the bible ended with Revelations which was the death and destruction we have to look forward to.

Brian: That stuff is hard to understand. The last couple chapters are about no more pain, crying or death. Everything will be paradise. That is the end of the book. It seems like everything in life is like that. You go through pain and crying then you have a kid and all this joy comes to you. The book of Revelations reminds me of that. All the pain and craziness followed by joy, perfection and a paradise. You need to search the bible for this though; you can get the wrong idea about things sometimes.

The Gauntlet: The album will be coming out through your label?

Brian: Yeah, Driven Music Group, it is with Ryko and Warner Music Group.

The Gauntlet: Was it ‘this album is so good you had to release it yourself?’

Brian: No, I wanted control over my life and wanted to be able to do things the way I want. I am in a good position now to do that. Some people will like it, some will hate it. I like it. I don’t think it’s the best album ever or anything like that.

The Gauntlet: Music is so much more universal than books. I’m guessing that your new album will reach more kids than the book did.

Brian: Yeah, exactly. My problems are the worst of the worst. Heroin and meth are pretty dark stuff. A lot of people get inspired by hearing of a victory over drugs. Everyone knows someone who is addicted; whether it is a friend, family or themselves. People like to hear a story that doesn’t end in death. Even if you aren’t on meth, people can substitute their problem. If they don’t do meth, maybe they drink too much on the weekends.

The Gauntlet: Meth is the nastiest of all the drugs. You basically take it if you want to die in 2 years. How’d you get on that?

Brian: Have you tried it?

The Gauntlet: No

Brian: When I was doing it, I tried to take care of myself and be a functioning drug addict. I had responsibilities as a dad which I wasn’t doing well. I was also in a band and had a career. I thought I was a functioning addict though. I brushed my teeth and ate. You do it and feel like superman then you come down and feel like a gutter person. Then you promise yourself you won’t do it again, then you get drunk and do it again. I always promised myself I wouldn’t get on meth as I saw what it did to people. My ex-wife left my daughter with the babysitter and took off and did meth for months. I told myself I would never do that. I probably ended up doing it because I was talking so much crap about it; saying she was a scumbag and she should die. Then all of the sudden I got hooked and it happened to me. What comes around goes around.

The Gauntlet: Will you let your daughter read the book?

Brian: She is reading it now. There is a children’s version out on Harper Collins. Some of the Christians thought it was too dark to read or for their kids to read. We edited it. My daughter is reading it now. She wanted to read it before as a couple kids at her school read it so she wanted to read it. She was about a quarter of the way through and put it down.

The Gauntlet: Did she ask those hard questions?

Brian: Yeah, that was rough. When she reads the unedited version; that is when it will be really rough. It talks about me thumping on my ex-wife and her thumping on me. She knows I am forgiven and it is ok. I was an ass before; that guy is dead.

The Gauntlet: Did you substitute one addiction for another, God for drugs?

Brian: That is kinda what I did. I was pretty crazy about it in the beginning. If you listen to the music, I am back to normal. I can totally fit in with people anywhere now. I am not all nuts about it now. I needed that addiction swap in the beginning though as the drugs were killing me. I needed to make that jump. I traded drugs for life. It is what I needed to do. I am healthier and happier now. Look at me now.

The Gauntlet: A lot of Christian music turns metal fans off as they don’t want to hear about Jesus. I found your album not to be preachy, but to be about the journey in life you took. How do you convey this to some of your past fans?

Brian: Hopefully it will get around by word of mouth the way it is supposed to be. If people would just listen to it, they will find out like you did. Hopefully that will happen to a lot of people out there. The album rocks, it is a heavy album. I just want to share my stuff. That’s what Korn did in the early days. Jonathan wrote about stuff that happened to him when he was younger. I didn’t want to hit people over the head with my beliefs, just share my heart with them. That is what I was going for. I was a little bit preachy in the beginning.

The Gauntlet: A little?

Brian: Ok a lot-a-bit. Damn that methamphetamine. I take no blame, I blame it all on the drugs. [laughs] Like you said, meth is the nastiest one out there.

The Gauntlet: Did you have a moment of clarity that showed you the light like in the movies?

Brian: I tried to go to rehab, out-patient in Hollywood. The guy was telling me that all kinds of actors go there to get cleaned up. He gave me all these medications to take my cravings. I didn’t need more drugs. I told everyone I was going to go on vacation for a week to clear my head, no one knew I was on meth. I went away and took the pills and kicked meth…I thought. On the second day, I went into this deep dark depression and thought if I didn’t do a line I would die. I found some speed and did it. I found God as a last resort. I was either going to have to go to some rehab and be tied down in a straight jacket to get off the stuff or go to church with some guys I knew. They offered to take me. I just wanted to see if something from these goody-goody people would rub off on me. I didn’t think God was real, no one had proven to me that he was. When I got there, a guy said Christ was real and all you need to do is ask him for the power to remove these things from my life. I thought ‘wow, this guy is either an idiot or he really knows something.’ I went home, did drugs, and talked to God. I asked if he was real or if I was just talking to the air. For a couple weeks, I felt that I had a spiritual awakening. I threw away the drugs and for three years, I haven’t done drugs or had the cravings. I had one craving when I found the drugs in my closet two months later. The thought came to my mind as nobody would no. Instead I walked out of the room and asked for strength from God. I got the idea to get my camera and take pictures of me flushing the drugs. It is a trophy of me kicking the drugs ass. There is a picture of the last bit of meth in the toilet.

The Gauntlet: Was that the premise to the song “Flush?”

Brian: Kinda, It wasn’t what I was thinking but you can put it to that.