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I have crossed my Rubicon

The windowsill they call it

How simple it actually is

Though my legs tremble with fear

I think it’s done

I can't change it now

No more laughing, weekend dancing

Like a doll made of many rags

I'm falling head down freely

completely out of control

I wanted to die with more dignity

I was supposed to be upright

And here the fate at the end of the path

At such a moment is unfaithful

and it's swirled me around

I'm about to die a quick death

and I can change nothing

I still have some time left

I have a few apologies in my head

That I wasn't perfect

That I didn't give people flowers

I've got one fear inside me, that's terrible

What my family will say

That I did it myself so casually

I fell out of a window due to suffering

But I think those close to me

They’ll buy an indulgence at the vestry

The priest will calm their neurosis

So that all is quiet in the village

There will be some moans and weeping

Stories that I was perfect

And that there was a witness

That I fell out by accident