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I was there at the cable fair

Where lump fairies swear at glories far beyond the fabric that she wears

He said "Do you wanna chair?"

I'd join him anywhere!

A hole in the ground, in this theatre I found J.C.'s infernal horde

They caper, they banter, forming human pyramids, all to please

Their infernal Lord... Whoa! His name is J. Cousteau!!!

A pussy and I know you know!!

I know you know, and there he goes

He goes and grows

Oh gosh he knows

Aboard the Calypso!!

The foam beside, and a burly sea to ride, all spell goodness for the master of the whirling pimple tides

He tried and pried until the rusted hinges sighed, and then he stepped inside!

He found her there, swimming in her seaweed hair, looking vaguely like a lover who has hung herself with underwear

Phosphoresent green and the sex-act made obscene, in Jacques galleon of hatred

This wrinkled French man is a living GOD!!!

Cousteau, you know, where the dying dolphinsgo, and the wasteland ever growing, never slowing till it's far below

Put it on your T.V. show - And let the humans know!!!