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An upward march

Building up towards the future

Here comes success

Gather round me and worship

King of my domain

None can challenge

The strength of my curriculum vitae

Reputable scholar

Broke the H-index

Impenetrable to the laity

Look on my citations and weep

You get what you deserve

You broke it you bought it

A life of letters

In an illiterate world

You die forgotten

You lie inert

A life of letters

Won’t fit on a stone

A downward slide

Churning out publications

Read by no one

Impact factor zero

King of your domain

None care to challenge

The length of your curriculum vitae

Reputable scholar

Five TikTok subscribers

Icon of inanity

Look on my citations and weep

You get what you deserve

You broke it you bought it

A life of letters

In an illiterate world

You die forgotten

You lie inert

A life of letters

Won’t fit on a stone