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*tap-tap*

Is this- is this thing on?

Okay, so I was craving a bowl of pasta but I'm not Italian, so I don't know how to the fuck to make one

So, I did what any uncultured swine would and ordered it off Uber Eats, and surprise surprise, it tasted like shit.

It really did

Pasta wasn't good, pasta was not very good.

( x 4 )

So I threw it in the bin, got a good recipe and bought the ingredients

Made it up and followed the recipe exactly.

Turns out, it was still pretty shit.

Pasta was shit, pasta was very shit.

( x 4 )

Then I got real hungry, so I-